What I Learned

Fasting as defined by Wikipedia is ... primarily the act of willingly abstaining from some or all food, drink, or both, for a period of time.

On June 1, I embarked on something new for me... a partial fast, and a blogging fast... You can read about my intentions here.

Here is how I did...

• I do know that I will be taking a bloggy break for the 21 days. (promise me you will come back after this?!)

  I took a bloggy break (did you miss me?)... I thought that I would take some time to do some writing, journaling, etc and even planned to take part in Jeff Goins' 15 Habits of Great Writers series, but I hardly did any writing at all, which was a little discouraging to me.)

• I do know that I have 2 things specifically that I will be praying about, for God to show me what the next step is...

  I discovered I really don't know much about prayer (more on that later) and I still feel a little lost in the 2 areas in which I am looking for a breakthrough...

• I do know that I will be doing a partial fast... I read and like the idea of the hours of 6AM to 3PM for a partial fast. (not from all food, but definitely something)

  I did a partial fast from 6AM to 3PM and I chose the Daniel Fast... Fruits and Veggies and Water. I missed my morning coffee immensely... but that did lead to some morning prayer. Some days are harder than others... like SUNDAY when the big meal is before 3PM. It did show me a lot about my eating habits. So often I was tempted to snack while meal prepping for my kids, or finishing their uneaten plates, etc. Licking my fingers, munching here and there, sneaking candy or whatever! Mostly, I did well on this part. Occasionally I choose to break the fast, but I felt grace in those moments (does that defeat the purpose?)

• I do know that I'm a little scared... and afraid of failing!

  What exactly does failing look like?  
  

The last 3 weeks have been like every other day in my life in that there were successes and there were failures; there were accidental breaking of the fast and intentional breaking of the fast; there were strong moments and weak moments. I learned much... but not enough!

I also know that fasting is supposed to be a private thing, but I also want to share some of what God is teaching me.

A friend on Facebook posted this on her page last week... and it hit me right between the eyes!!

You can pray without fasting, and fast without prayer. It is when these two activities are combined and dedicated to God’s glory that they reach their full effectiveness. Having a dedicated time of prayer and fasting is not a way of manipulating God into doing what you desire. Rather, it is simply forcing yourself to focus and rely on God for the strength, provision, and wisdom you need.

To be honest, I don't think I truly understand the power of prayer. I do a lot of sentence prayers, talking to God in the moment, knowing that He hears me, but not truly getting on my knees and begging Him for answers. While I did improve my focus on prayer during this 21 Day Allume fast, thanks to The Valley of Vision (a book of Puritan Prayers), I by no means touched the surface of what the effectual, fervent prayer of a righteous man really is. 

I could use my kids as an excuse, but to be honest, more often than not it was just me getting distracted. Thinking about the next thing that needed to be done, my wants, my cravings. Not really praying, believing! And in that, I'm discouraged, but not despaired.

I would love to try this again sometime (probably more privately). But before I do, I want to learn more about prayer, so I'm asking you.  
Do you understand prayer? 
Do you know how to pray? 
Is there any book you would recommend on the subject of prayer?

I've missed blogging and the community that comes with blogging... so I'd love it if you would take a moment to share your thoughts/experiences on prayer (and/or fasting)!

And yes, it is one day short of 21 days, but I wanted to join in with the lovely ladies over at Write it, Girl for their surprise summer link up!! 

preparing for fast

If you follow this blog much, you know that I mention Allume occasionally! But you see, it's not JUST a blogging conference (that's actually called Allume Social... and I still really, really want to go {anybody wanna pay my way?!?!}).  It's also a community of like minded women who are oh, so welcoming and oh, so encouraging!

And I read the blog most days... It's got a lot of great stuff. Last week, one of the contributors shared about her plan for a 21 day fast.  And she encouraged us to join her...

And it struck a cord with me and I've been thinking about it and dwelling on it a lot over the last week (is that the same as praying?!?!).

At first, I was thinking about a fast from obsessing over stats and comments on my blog... and then I thought maybe I should fast from blogging altogether for 21 days... but then I thought, "What about Five Minute Friday, and Project 52, and the JoyDare and, and, and..." And I just didn't know what to do... and not many of my "in real life" friends get this blogging thing I do, or even understand the community I find in blogging (although I'm sure a few of them read my blog and never comment), So I didn't even know where to go to ask for advice...

Then, when I read into it a little further, I read this...
"Simply stated, biblical fasting is refraining from food for a spiritual purpose."

and I'm all about following the rules...

However,
in the first 3 weekends of June I have...

• my son's birthday
• a Ladies' conference (which is known for GREAT food)
• and my nephew's high school graduation and subsequent grad party!
• (and when I don't eat... I get cranky, plain and simple, and very unpleasant to be around)

all this to say, that it's almost June 1 and I'm still not sure what I'm doing! But I want to be purposeful and I want it to be beneficial and I want God to bring Dry Bones to LIFE again!!

• I do know that I will be taking a bloggy break for the 21 days. (promise me you will come back after this?!)
• I do know that I have 2 things specifically that I will be praying about, for God to show me what the next step is...
• I do know that I will be doing a partial fast... I read and like the idea of the hours of 6AM to 3PM for a partial fast. (not from all food, but definitely something)
• I do know that I'm a little scared... and afraid of failing!

...Pray for me, would you?