Tuesday, February 5

Where does fear fit in dreaming?

What’s one fear you’ve faced when it comes to your God-sized dream?  And what’s the truth that’s bigger than that fear? 
Fear! I've been thinking a lot about fear lately... Holley Gerth asked us to answer the previous questions this week as part of pursuing our God-Sized Dreams. It's been stewing in my head, and in my heart, but I have been unable to get it down on paper (or on screen).

Then Lisa-Jo gave us the prompt for Five Minute Friday and it was ... AFRAID! and I thought about it all weekend. To be honest, I'm afraid that I will never blog again and that I won't be able to get the words out right.

At the beginning of the year, I shared my dreams with you... dreams to be a better wife and mom. dreams to connect with others through writing and card making. Dreams to CREATE... Part of fulfilling those dreams (the writing ones, anyway) involve going back to school.
And I was SOOO AFRAID of that.
So afraid of being out of place with a bunch of 18-22 year olds.
So afraid of forgetting how to do homework and write academic papers and take tests and participate in class interactions and group projects and having to read and read and write and write.

But I did it anyway! Through the strong encouragement of my awesome husband (he rocks, by the way) and my dad, and some friends, and my high school English teacher who is now my college advisor (Go, God!), I went back to college. Just a class or two, but I'm doing it... and right now I'm still afraid, because I can't keep up... or at least I feel like I can't keep up.

And in pursuing this dream, my dreams of being a better wife and mom and being a crafter are dying by strangulation... I haven't made cards in almost a month... and my laundry sits unfolded for five+ days and my bathroom tub needs an intervention... and the bed sheets (well, let's not go there).

So fear creeps in and I begin to doubt and I wonder... am I doing the right thing here??!?! I fear failure, and I fear the unknown... What is my God-sized Dream, really?

My God-sized Dream is... a desire in my heart for more of what God has for me.

Do you know what God has for me? Do you know what God has for you? Thankfully, one thing I have been getting right is more time in God's Word and the Scripture He has given me this week speaks right to this matter...


2 Timothy 1:7 For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power and of love, and of a sound mind. (v. 12) or I know whom I have believed, and am persuaded that he is able to keep that which I have committed unto him against that day. (v. 13) Hold fast the form of sound words, which thou hast heard of me, in faith and love which is in Christ Jesus.

Psalm 27:1 The Lord is my light and my salvation, whom shall I fear? The Lord is the strength of my life, of whom shall I be afraid? (v. 4)  One thing have I desired of the Lord, that will I seek after; that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to behold the beauty of the Lord, and to enquire in his temple. (v. 11) Teach me thy way, O Lord and lead me in the plain path... (v. 14) Wait on the Lord be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart; wait, I say, on the Lord.

I write these verses for me as much as for you... I need to remind myself of them every single day. The truth that combats the fear!  What truth can you share with me, that's bigger than fear?

And I know this post is already too long and I'm hoping you've stuck with me, because I have one more thing I want to share regarding dreaming. This part of the post has been in my drafts for weeks. And it has to do with dreaming, so I'm giving it to you today!!

I went to see Les Miserables a few weeks ago, an afternoon out with some girl friends. I saw it on Broadway back in '96, I think. While I sat in the theater and the movie started playing, I was amazed at how the music just came back to me. I was totally singing along in my head. I don't know how I remembered it from so long ago.  Maybe I have heard it in other places and just didn't realize it.

Then a friend of mine started posting You Tube videos on "how the songs were supposed to be song" and I love her for it, because for the rest of the evening (far too late into the evening)I spent listening to every Les Miserables song I could find...

and in the midst of it all, I found this one...

Seriously, is there any other dream so amazing?  I don't know much of Susan Boyle, and while I remember the whole leap to fame and all, I'm not sure I listened to it then.  and I know nothing of her spiritual, religous background, but I feel this could have been described as a "God-sized Dream."

Now go out there and dream... dream big! Dream God-sized Dreams! You know He wants great things for you!


  1. You go Girl!! Dream those dreams and don't let the enemy take them away from you. You are amazing and all these different facets will start to work together in ways you haven't even thought of yet. Imagine whimsical cards with witty, well-written verse about unfolded laundry. It's a gold-mine you're sitting on there whatever it ends up being! I'm also glad I wasn't the only one posting videos of how those songs should've been done (or maybe I was). Those verses are power, hold them close!

  2. Love these words...."a desire in my heart for more of what God has for me." YES I totally get this! I too am trying to figure out what that "dream" really is...but realizing that I need work on my own heart to "perfect" any area of my life...so this should be my prayer as well!

  3. Love this post...that verse in 2 Timothy is one God has been speaking to me over and over. (and over and over...) I love that we can rely on the power of His Word even when we're scared out of our minds! Praying for you, my God-Sized Dream sister. Thank you so much for sharing this piece of your heart today! Blessings! :)

  4. I want to let you know that you are setting a wonderful example to your children. It is good for them to see that "Mommy" has dreams as well. That it is a healthy, Godly thing to have dreams and try to fulfill them with His help...and that "Mommy" is NOT neglectful for prioritizing the time to fulfill them. Yours is a challenging balancing act. I am praying that God shows you all then "whens and wheres" of your dream :0). Happy writing!

  5. I agree with Donna. Your kids will learn so much from seeing you pursue your dreams. You are teaching them so much about trusting God and completely following after Him.

  6. Ah, Julie! I am so thankful that you wrote this post! It is a joy to see where God is taking you. I am not in college and I don't want to talk about the sheets either!! :) You keep pursuing those dreams. Clearly, God is in them.

  7. Dear Julie,
    I am so proud of you for following your dream of going back to school...and who said laundry needs to folded in less than five days (wink)?

    So glad and grateful we are buddies and I look forward to getting to know you better. God answered prayer and you got your post done, and I just put mine up :)

  8. I love this!!! I remember the fear of going back to college - I returned part time 7 years ago and this year September I'll be taking the leap to full time school!! And I deal with fear all the time... but those verses that you hold on to... those are truth that conquers fear every. single. time.

  9. What a wonderful message. So true about fear getting in the way of our dreams. And isn't there joy in failure at times because you tried!!! Thanks for sharing. Came from FMF. http://bellesbazaar-heather.blogspot.com/2014/03/afraid-5-minute-prompt.html


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